Monthly Archives: September 2004

Dilberta wrote…

Posted on 30/9/2004 by jasmine

In my comments: But hey Rachel I hope you feel as though you’ve made the world a better place by slamming me on a mute point. We need more senseless agression in the world. Wouldn’t it be great if everyone … Continue reading →

Posted in General | 5 Comments

Me vs the SonyEricsson P910

Posted on 29/9/2004 by jasmine

The P910 has a cute little QWERTY keyboard on the inside of the flip. It’s a bit small for my (not excessively huge) fingers…

Posted in Minutiae | 5 Comments

Hint to HP

Posted on 28/9/2004 by jasmine

This is where you take the hint the market is giving you and start making Alphas again.

Posted in General | 2 Comments

This is outstandingly cool

Posted on 27/9/2004 by jasmine

Grappa It’s, um, odd.

Posted in General | 2 Comments

Sorry

Posted on 27/9/2004 by jasmine

I’d just like to apologize to all the people who were clearly scared off by three inventions in one day. Come back, I still love you. I’ll be back to wombling about religion and politics in a few days, I’m … Continue reading →

Posted in General | Leave a comment

Non-mendacious toaster

Posted on 27/9/2004 by jasmine

Toasters and their associated turnybuttons are notoriously unlikely to tell the truth. I demand a toaster that does not lie to me! A smarter toaster. We have the technology. And this is how you do it. You need a toaster … Continue reading →

Posted in Anger, Invention | 2 Comments

Variable quantization psychoacoustic modelling audio codec

Posted on 27/9/2004 by jasmine

It is apparent that the existing MPEG audio layer 3 has certain limitations when it comes to accurate reproduction of complex signals. The muting problem- where a loud event in the music causes instruments to disappear momentarily- cannot easily be … Continue reading →

Posted in Invention | 2 Comments

Adaptive phone menu system

Posted on 27/9/2004 by jasmine

I propose a phone menu system that learns which options you choose most often and places them first in their respective menus. This will reduce the number of times I have to tak tak tak click past outbox, saved, options … Continue reading →

Posted in Invention | 1 Comment

Tales of Woe, part 1

Posted on 26/9/2004 by jasmine

This one’s from the archives, since I don’t really have anything to say today. I spent a year and a half living in the south of France, near Nice, when I was working for Texas Instruments. The job was boring, … Continue reading →

Posted in General | 2 Comments

Waking up in Cambridge

Posted on 25/9/2004 by jasmine

….oh no, not again.

Posted in General | 1 Comment

I have been overwhelmed

Posted on 24/9/2004 by jasmine

…by the sheer coolness of the ARM1136JF-S microprocessor. At last, ARM has made this thing’s detailed specs public, so I can talk about it. Seriously. Check this baby out: 32-bit ARM microprocessor, under 5mm^2 400-600MHz in 120nm design rules under … Continue reading →

Posted in General | 4 Comments

Off with his head, man

Posted on 22/9/2004 by jasmine

So people are, once again, being decapitated. I should add that personally, I don’t think that being decapitated is in any way more horrible than being shot in the chest or abdomen. I’ve had my share of violent trauma and, … Continue reading →

Posted in General | 1 Comment

Slick

Posted on 22/9/2004 by jasmine

It’s got a sampled riff A chick with lift But what’s the diff If it gets you stiff Backing off the bridge Anna magnet on the fridge Hook to twitch you bitch out the kitsch You’re the purple plastic classic … Continue reading →

Posted in Minutiae | 1 Comment

Wonder if we’ll ever know

Posted on 21/9/2004 by jasmine

Is there life on Mars? My gut feeling says yes. Life is too pervasive a process on Earth for it to be a freak occurrence. Even advanced intelligence has evolved multiple times on Earth- orcas and humans have it at … Continue reading →

Posted in General | 5 Comments

Night shooting requires a rapid film

Posted on 17/9/2004 by jasmine

You’ve probably all seen these photos already, but I thought I’d collect a few of my favourites together: Bikinis on the beach, Nice, midnight (this *is* work safe): Nicoise Evening (Fuji Velvia ISO1600 film, f/2.4, 50mm Pentacon, IR block, some … Continue reading →

Posted in General | 5 Comments

Haiku

Posted on 17/9/2004 by jasmine

SomethingAwful forums have many great ideas, but this is one I feel compelled to steal. The concept is simple: write haiku of your working day. Excellent viewing Out of fifth floor, North. I see a big wheel. What do you … Continue reading →

Posted in Documentation, Minutiae | 4 Comments

Neocon economic analysts are full of shit

Posted on 15/9/2004 by jasmine

Seriously. America saw 403, 300 hi-tech jobs disappear between April 2001 and April 2004. More than half the jobs lost were lost after the recession was pronounced officially over, by the National Bureau of Economic Research, in November 2001. San … Continue reading →

Posted in Anger | 11 Comments

Slightly mugged

Posted on 14/9/2004 by jasmine

On my way home last night- rather late and, indeed, somewhat tired and emotional- I got off the night bus at Harrow-on-the-Hill bus station and walked towards my house, past the Job Centre. This is what I usually do. This … Continue reading →

Posted in Minutiae | 13 Comments

Daisy, Daisy

Posted on 13/9/2004 by jasmine

RTEST: SUCCESS : T_SHAL test completed O.K. RESULTS —————————————————————————- * Verified security checking —————————————————————————- Waiting a short while for key press… RTEST: SUCCESS : T_SHAL test completed O.K. Yes. My HAL works. :-)

Posted in General | 3 Comments

Where was the kaboom?

Posted on 12/9/2004 by jasmine

I didn’t write this, but seriously: IRAQ: Look! I’m Iraq! I swear to god I don’t have any weapons of mass destruction! You can even send your experts in to prove it! EXPERTS: Nope, no weapons, couldn’t find a damned … Continue reading →

Posted in General | 2 Comments